The funk
I have decided that I am in a funk. Today's inspirational words from none other than Doug-E-The-Pudge got me thinking about whether or not I hear God in my life. And if I don't, why not? Am I not ready to hear him, or maybe I'm just not listening. I also feel a strong voice in my head lately telling me things I know to be wrong. I fear this is clouding my view of things, or the right voice.
I want to make a change in myself, and I know that I have somewhat. I think that I let fear control most of my decisions, especially when it means I'd have to speak up or reach out to others. Trying to connect to others has been and is very uncomfortable to me but not undesired, and that is where satan has been taking advantage of me.It's sneaky how satan can take advantage of something that you feel is lacking in your life. Creeping into your thoughts, slowly at first but then it feels like he's screaming until you say okay, that's enough!
I need strength, courage, and confidence, all of which are foreign to me. So how do you break down years of fear and self-doubt? How do you get past the wrong voices so that you can hear the right ones? I can't expect others to anticipate my wants or needs, I can't expect them to always reach out to me especially when I seem like I don't want them to. All I want is to know that when I'm gone people will think of me and have a few things to say because they really knew who I was.
Maybe that is my problem, maybe I am afraid to reach out to God as well?
I want to make a change in myself, and I know that I have somewhat. I think that I let fear control most of my decisions, especially when it means I'd have to speak up or reach out to others. Trying to connect to others has been and is very uncomfortable to me but not undesired, and that is where satan has been taking advantage of me.It's sneaky how satan can take advantage of something that you feel is lacking in your life. Creeping into your thoughts, slowly at first but then it feels like he's screaming until you say okay, that's enough!
I need strength, courage, and confidence, all of which are foreign to me. So how do you break down years of fear and self-doubt? How do you get past the wrong voices so that you can hear the right ones? I can't expect others to anticipate my wants or needs, I can't expect them to always reach out to me especially when I seem like I don't want them to. All I want is to know that when I'm gone people will think of me and have a few things to say because they really knew who I was.
Maybe that is my problem, maybe I am afraid to reach out to God as well?
posted by Best of 1980 @ 7:25 PM
6 Comments:
At 9:03 AM,
Four-Leaf K' lover said…
DEP had a very strong message yesterday and it did get the wheels spinning. Just when you think you may have something figured out, WHAM...realization sets in. We get hurt by those who "love us"...but in the end, Gods' love is the only love that matters.
At 6:48 PM,
I'm Back!!! said…
If you don't risk anything you will not gain any thing. If you risk reaching out you may make some friends. Some Good friends.
thanks for being there for me the last few months.
At 10:01 PM,
Swinging Sammy said…
You should take some time in The Word, (even if it's in the middle of the night). Just start reading through the Psalms (great stories of funks and rescues from funk), or Proverbs (quick easy reading), or read one of the Gospels (my favorite when I am struggling).
Then take time to listen to Him talking. It's worked for me many times. Don't give up.
At 11:49 AM,
Doug E. Pudge said…
Melissa, the one thing for sure is that breaking those old habits will take time. There was a phrase that I learned in GA, live one day at a time. Sometimes a whole day is hard so live one hour at a time, or one minute or even one second. Life changes have to begin somewhere and the only thing you have in your life is right now. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow hasn't arrived. Changes worth having take time and energy, they rarely come easy. If you make one little change in your life today (I like Sammy's suggestion personally) then build the necessary life changes from that point forward! Life is not a sprint but a "super-marathon" (yes I made that up)! Don't let the enemy fool you into thinking that just because you might not "feel" God, doesn't mean that He isn't right beside you. B4T
At 6:31 PM,
I'm Back!!! said…
I learned a saying in Chicago that says...
If you keep doing what you have been doing, you will keep getting what you are getting.
I know change is hard. We deal with it every day here. But like the boys said. One thing at a time. I have found out that we had to slow down, it is less stressful and funner. We need to get together and go swimming some time. the Hubby is here for the summer and he can carry all the towels and lifejackets and bags and kids. :) He doesn't know I just volunteered him. Hehehe.
hang in there. some times I need to sit and analize what is going on in my head and inturpet it in the right way and not from our past.
we Love you guys and really appreciate all you have done for us.
:)
At 8:55 PM,
wowgirl said…
I have suffered that negative dark voice myself. It's powerful and it fools you into thinking the very worst of yourself. What's good is that you retain the capacity to recognize it as false. Spending time in the bible will further clarify that (advice I should more frequently follow myself). You have alot to offer those around you. I know that for a fact...I'm proud to call you a friend.
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